Control rarely introduces itself as control. In spiritual environments, it often comes wrapped in soft words and concerned tones.
“We’re only saying this because we love you.”
“We just want to see you restored.”
“You’re putting others at risk.”
“It’s not personal—it’s protection.”
These phrases may sound pastoral, but in certain settings, they function more like warning labels—designed not to invite conversation, but to restrict freedom and isolate dissent.
What begins as “concern” can quietly become a way to categorize someone who no longer fits the mold. The questions they ask, the boundaries they set, or the discernment they express begins to feel inconvenient to the system. And once someone is labeled—“unsafe,” “rebellious,” “toxic,” “divisive”—the community is taught to treat them differently, even without a formal removal.
In one church, a member was repeatedly told they were being “ministered to” and “pursued in love.” But behind the scenes, leadership described them as a danger to others. There was no effort to clarify concerns. No specific charge. Just a shift in language that began to follow them everywhere they went.
This is how control masquerades as care. Not with cruelty—but with labels.
A powerful and relevant story is found in Mark 3, where Jesus is publicly labeled as “possessed by Beelzebul” and mentally unstable—by both the religious leaders and His own family. Their goal? To protect reputation, prevent disruption, and control perception.
Strategic Mislabelling in the Ministry of Jesus
In Mark 3, Jesus’ ministry is gaining attention—but it’s also gaining resistance.
As He casts out demons and teaches with authority, the scribes respond not with questions, but with labels:
“He is possessed by Beelzebul,” and, “He casts out the demons by the ruler of the demons.” — Mark 3:22
At the same time, His own family comes to take hold of Him, saying:
“He has lost His senses.” — Mark 3:21
These weren’t minor insults. They were public strategies to diminish credibility and neutralize disruption.
The religious leaders couldn’t stop the miracles, so they tried to stop the man by controlling the narrative. They reframed supernatural clarity as spiritual confusion. They labeled divine power as demonic threat.
Jesus wasn’t just misunderstood—He was strategically mislabeled. Not because He was wrong, but because He was uncontrollable.
This is the essence of spiritual labeling: it doesn’t engage the person—it contains them. It paints them with a broad brush so the system doesn’t have to reckon with their truth.
And it still happens today.
Love Listens, Labels Dismiss
Real love doesn’t label people—it listens to them. It doesn’t control—it invites. It doesn’t silence questions—it leans in with grace and truth.
When spiritual language is used to push people out rather than draw them in, something vital has been lost. Love has been replaced with fear. And care has become a cover for control.
But Jesus never mislabeled the wounded. He never used “concern” as a way to avoid responsibility. He called the broken near, restored their dignity, and challenged systems that used authority to protect themselves.
If you’ve ever been labeled in a church setting—if your name was changed to difficult, rebellious, or unsafe without a conversation—know this: Jesus still calls you by your true name.
He doesn’t need to reframe your story to protect His image. He already gave His life to restore yours.
And real spiritual care—the kind rooted in the gospel—won’t shame you into silence. It will walk with you toward freedom.
Called by Name, Not by Label
Labels are easy. Love is costly.
Anyone can attach a word to someone who disrupts comfort or challenges control. But Jesus never reduced people to categories. He saw beyond the noise. He spoke names, not warnings.
If you’ve been dismissed with religious concern, or if someone claimed they were “loving” you while actively silencing or sidelining you—God sees the difference.
And if you’re struggling to untangle who you really are from the names others gave you, Jesus can help you start again. He doesn’t need to wait for the system’s approval to restore you. He already knows your voice, your story, and your heart.
He never said, “Blessed are the perfectly behaved.” He said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit… the persecuted… those who mourn.” The ones the system tries to eject, He welcomes with open arms.
You are not unsafe because you asked a hard question. You are not rebellious because you set a boundary. You are not toxic because you longed for clarity or truth. You are loved.
And the One who calls you by name will never let a label define your worth.
Think It Through
- Have I ever been told something was “loving” when it actually felt silencing, shaming, or controlling?
- What labels—spoken or implied—have been placed on me by people in spiritual authority? How have those labels shaped my identity or worth?
- Have I ever witnessed someone being subtly reframed with spiritual language? How did I respond?
- How can I tell the difference between real spiritual care and fear-based control?
- What might Jesus say to me if He removed the labels others have used and called me by name instead?
Break Point Collection
In the next article of The Breaking Point Collection, we’ll explore how phrases like “We’re just trying to protect others” or “You’re a danger to the body” are often used not to protect the church—but to protect power. And how that language becomes the open door to quiet removal.
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