Navigating Romantic Love

Navigating Romantic Love

Romantic love is a concept that has captivated humanity throughout the ages. In today’s culture, however, the understanding and expression of romantic love often deviates from the beautiful example set forth in the Bible. In this article, we will delve into the Song of Solomon 8:3-4, which provides insights into the nature of romantic love as portrayed in Scripture. By examining these verses, we can gain valuable lessons that will guide us in cultivating healthy, God-honoring relationships.

Song of Solomon chapter 8 verses 3-4 reads,
“Let his left hand be under my head
     And his right hand embrace me.”
“I want you to swear, O daughters of Jerusalem,
     Do not arouse or awaken my love
     Until she pleases.”

The Influence of Today’s Culture

Sexual love plays a significant role in romantic relationships. However, human sexuality is subject to cultural influences, which shape our perceptions and practices. In some cultures, sexuality is regarded as secretive and private, while in others, it is embraced as open and uninhibited. Sadly, the prevailing cultural norms of today’s society often awaken love prematurely, disregarding the biblical principle of waiting until it pleases.

God’s View on Sexual Intimacy

As the creator of sexuality, God has provided guidance on how it should be approached and cherished. The Song of Solomon, a collection of love songs, presents an intimate dialogue between the Bridegroom, the Bride, and their chorus of friends. While the focus is on the intimate love between a man and a woman, the community’s influence on sexual love should not be overlooked. Although sex itself is a private act, the values and beliefs of the community can either reinforce healthy perspectives or perpetuate harmful ideologies.

God’s Stance on Sexuality

Let’s address a common misconception upfront: God is not against sex. He intricately designed our bodies with a vast network of nerves and biological systems that work together harmoniously. God’s intention is not to deny us the beauty of sexual intimacy but rather to protect us from manipulation and abuse. When Christians advocate for abstinence before marriage, it is not to withhold pleasure, but rather to safeguard individuals from potential harm and ensure their emotional and physical well-being.

Marriage as a Divine Reflection

When God established marriage in Genesis, He did so with a higher purpose in mind. The act of sexual intimacy within the bounds of marriage mirrors God’s divine nature and the act of creation. Just as the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit worked in unity to bring forth life, a man and a woman create life through their union. In the sinless existence of Adam and Eve, sexual intimacy was pure and untainted.

The Effects of Sin on Sexual Intimacy

However, with the entry of sin into the world, the original design for sexual intimacy was marred. As societies grew, sexual practices evolved, and people pursued their own desires without regard for God’s plan. The concept of sexual fidelity became distorted, leading to abuse and a departure from God’s intended purpose. While sexual practices may have seemed instinctive, the sanctity of a committed relationship between one man and one woman was compromised.

God’s Desire for Fidelity

Throughout the Bible, God emphasizes the importance of fidelity and the exclusivity of the covenant relationship. He likens His relationship with Israel to that of a faithful spouse, and any departure from their exclusive devotion is described as adultery. God’s desire for a distinct and unwavering relationship with His people reflects His deep love and commitment to them. In the person of Jesus, this concept finds its ultimate fulfillment, as He calls the Church His Bride, demonstrating His sacrificial love and unwavering devotion.

The Significance of Sexual Purity

Sexual purity holds great significance to God. It not only safeguards against abuse and harmful practices but also serves as a reflection of His overall purpose and plan for His beloved. It symbolizes a committed relationship between two individuals—a selfless bond that God desires to share exclusively with His Bride. Our commitment to sexual purity aligns us with God’s divine purpose and demonstrates our reverence for the sacredness of intimate relationships.

Application: Embracing God’s Design

Having explored the Song of Solomon 8 and its profound insights into romantic love, we can now consider practical ways to apply these principles to our lives. Here are some steps we can take:

  1. Seek God’s guidance: Prioritize seeking God’s wisdom and understanding regarding romantic relationships. Pray for discernment and ask for His guidance in all aspects of your love life (Proverbs 3:5-6).
  2. Guard your heart: Just as the Song of Solomon advises not to awaken love until it pleases, exercise caution in matters of the heart. Wait for the right time and season for love to blossom, allowing God’s timing to guide your romantic journey (Song of Solomon 2:7).
  3. Cultivate community: Surround yourself with like-minded individuals who share your commitment to God’s design for romantic love. Engage in healthy discussions about relationships, seeking accountability and encouragement from fellow believers (Hebrews 10:24-25).
  4. Pursue purity: Strive for sexual purity in your thoughts, words, and actions. Honor God by embracing His standards for sexual intimacy and valuing the sanctity of marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18-20).


Romantic love, when approached from a Christian perspective, takes on a profound and beautiful meaning. By heeding the wisdom found in the Song of Solomon 8, we can navigate the complexities of love in today’s culture. As we embrace God’s design for romantic relationships, we reflect His love and bring glory to His name. May our pursuit of romantic love align with His Word and be characterized by purity, fidelity, and a deep reverence for the divine bond He desires to share with us, His beloved Bride.

About The Author

Jesse Velez

Although Jesse Velez will forever carry the essence of a Native New Yorker, he currently calls the sun-soaked city of Miami, Florida, his home. Celebrating a marriage of 31+ years to Eusebia, he proudly embraces his role as the father of five grown children. Jesse has cultivated a profound grasp of the Bible over the span of 40+ years, dedicated to following and serving Jesus while engaging in extensive reading and in-depth study of the scriptures.